This article is a summary of the period from March 5, 2023, to March 18, 2023.
Scene#
Looking at this long river, my mother sometimes tells me that she has never seen a river as beautiful, majestic, and fierce as the Mekong River in her entire life. The Mekong River and its tributaries surge through here, flowing into the ocean, and this vast expanse of water disappears into the depths of the ocean. These rivers flow extremely fast on the boundless plain, rushing like a torrent, as if the earth itself is tilting.
......The rapids are so fierce and powerful that they can wash away everything, even rocks, a cathedral, or a city. Underneath the river, a storm is raging. The wind is howling.
Excerpt from "Lover"
The vast lake surface shimmers with the reflection of the sky, and birds freely soar and play in the reeds between water and sky. The villages piled up on the distant water's edge appear narrow and cramped.
This scene was experienced while touring the West Lake in Dali Erhai. We were in the middle of the lake, surrounded by vast expanses of water, watching the free-spirited birds. In that moment, I felt that humans are trapped on a small and crowded land, how pitiful.
Life#
Due to a sprained foot at the beginning of March, I had to temporarily end my life of traveling. Every journey has an end, but journeys will also begin again.
Returning to Cangshan#
Last weekend, I went to Cangshan again. During my previous visit to Dali, the wind was very strong, and the cable car only operated halfway up the mountain. So this time, I wanted to make up for the regret of not reaching the mountaintop before. While waiting for the cable car, Ada asked me if I knew I would come to Cangshan again this time, would I still come last time? I thought about it, and rationally speaking, if I could foresee the future, I probably wouldn't. But in the end, there were too many coincidences behind the decision, and at that moment, I couldn't say no.
So what were the coincidences? Actually, it was mentioned in the previous weekly digest, my foot was sprained. If it weren't for the sprained foot, I originally planned to hike to Bird Hanging Mountain. But now, dragging my injured foot to hike over ten kilometers would be neglecting my body, so I chose to visit Cangshan Scenic Area instead. Apart from the cable car, it would take about three kilometers of walking and a climb of two hundred meters (fortunately, no heavy load to carry, thanks to Vico).
But I also understand that what a sprained foot needs the most is rest, and climbing Cangshan is already a big burden. Actually, my body was already struggling a lot when I came to Cangshan last time. It was in December last year, just a few days after I was infected with Covid-19, and my condition had not yet fully recovered. And this time, it was the fourth day after spraining my ligament. It was not easy to come to Dali, and I didn't want to leave too many regrets. Of course, one reason is that, but on the other hand, I always feel that there is a subconscious instinct in me that doesn't cherish my own life. I am practicing the "I want to show you the game of life" in a defiant manner to mock the absurdity of life, but at the same time, like Don Quixote, I have no idea what I am fighting against.
There Is Such a Thing as a Free Lunch#
For some reason, vegetarian food is popular in Dali, and many of them are free. However, there are many rules for eating free vegetarian food, such as not talking while eating, finishing all the food including the soup, etc. But no matter what the rules are, there is such a thing as a free lunch. Some people elevate this to the level of Universal Basic Income (UBI), and I understand this romantic sublimation. I also have some imagination about public life when it comes to temples and religions. In folk stories like "Master Lin Fengxue in the Snowy Mountain Temple," the temple plays the role of a free and unlicensed public space. For example, during the New Year, people go to temples to worship, pray for blessings, and remove feudal superstitions. This is also a common spiritual connection in society, and often the prayers reflect the common concerns, fears, and wishes of the whole society. But I often doubt myself and think that my fantasies are too unrealistic. So, with the attitude of integrating knowledge and action, this time I also experienced a free vegetarian meal.
In summary, it is still the same old saying: ideals are ideals, reality is reality. From queuing up to eat, the TV has been playing lectures from many years ago, talking about the ethics and morals of kings, ministers, fathers, and sons. "Having a daughter is worthy of humanity, having a son is worthy of ancestors..." Besides, it feels like someone is constantly watching you while eating, making sure you don't waste food. If I have to be indoctrinated with this kind of ideology in a strong and rough manner in order to eat free food, it is a meager meal for me. Of course, I understand that many people can ignore these words as if they haven't heard them, and I still need to learn this wisdom.
Apart from this, it is also worth mentioning that while queuing for food, I saw a person in flip-flops, with torn clothes and hair that seemed unwashed for a long time, who had a very hippie/backpacker style, also queuing up. And after finishing the meal, I saw someone coming to the restaurant and asking what time would be suitable to come if they wanted to wash dishes.
The Cycle of Life#
Last weekend, I went home to the hospital to visit my grandmother, and I have had some communication and contact with younger friends in the past two weeks. I can't talk about too many details, but I clearly felt the mighty power of life transitioning and a change in my own mindset. Especially when I was still immersed in the heavy mood about my grandmother's condition, suddenly having some communication with younger lives was a kind of redemption for me. "We will all die, but there will always be young people," in that moment, I understood this sentence better.
And the change in my mindset refers to the fact that many of the whims and caprices that I may have disliked in the past, I am now increasingly able to appreciate the self-awareness behind them. Each generation has its own wisdom and burdens. I am increasingly choosing to believe.
Health#
After the trip to Yunnan, I went to the hospital and visited the Sports Medicine Department to have a check-up. At least for the next two weeks, I plan to continue resting and walking less. The doctor prescribed a gel patch with flurbiprofen, which has been very effective in relieving soft tissue pain.
My ribs are still not completely healed, and there is still slight pain when turning over, pressing, or stretching. But compared to before, the pain is almost not affecting normal activities.
Input and Output#
Recently, I watched a movie called "Cinema Paradiso," combined with my friends around me, and some documentary stories I have seen before. The biggest feeling is still that beauty is definitely a curse for women, especially when beauty does not match their social status, especially when in an unhealthy society.
I am currently reading the novel "Lover" by Marguerite Duras. The world of literature is so beautiful.