This article is a summary of the period from March 26, 2023, to April 1, 2023.
Writing#
Excerpt and Appreciation#
"Walking downhill is a young man. He carries a bucket of manure on his shoulder, with a dirty towel wrapped around his head. His face is rosy, with plump cheeks and bright eyes. His feet sway as he walks downhill, distributing the weight on his shoulders. He is a toilet cleaner, or rather, a person who empties the septic tank, wearing rubber-soled socks and dark blue tight pants. As a five-year-old, I looked at him with curious eyes, feeling an incredible call from the darkness. At that time, I couldn't be sure what it meant, but I knew that there was a primitive power that was calling out to me in an inexplicable way. This enlightenment first appeared in a person who empties the septic tank, which is quite symbolic. Because feces symbolize the earth, this call must be the malicious love of Mother Earth.
I had a premonition that there was a burning desire in this world. I looked up at the young man's dirty figure, and my heart was gripped by a strong desire - I wanted to become him, I wished I was him. "I clearly remember that this desire had two focal points, one was the dark blue tight pants he was wearing, and the other was his profession. The dark blue tight pants clearly outlined the shape of his lower body, as if it was soft and elastic, walking towards me. I had an indescribable longing for tight pants. I didn't know the reason at that time."
- Excerpt from Yukio Mishima's "Confessions of a Mask"
Mishima's writing style is widely recognized as beautiful, and when I read "Confessions of a Mask", I truly felt the chilling beauty in his descriptions. This week, I didn't come across any new passages worth noting, so I will provide an excerpt and appreciation of some passages I read before.
This book has an autobiographical nature, and this passage describes the primitive impulse that young Mishima felt when he saw a man emptying the septic tank. It is a description of simple vitality that I really like. It vividly portrays the impulses and curiosity of his childhood - the "inexplicable call," the "burning desire," the pants that walked towards him as if they were soft and elastic, and the indescribable longing. But ultimately, it reflects on these desires from a retrospective perspective, adding a sense of depth - the "malicious love of Mother Earth," "I didn't know at that time."
Imitation and Creation#
Leaning against the back seat of the car, I stared blankly at the passing streetlights above. As the hustle and bustle of the day gradually faded away, the old alleys of the capital city became quiet first. In the dark and clean night sky, warm lights exuded a sense of tranquility and peace. Suddenly, I was gripped by a strong assertion - the end of time is emptiness, and summer has truly arrived now.
This passage describes a scene that I suddenly felt while sitting in a Didi car and looking out the window.
Aside: This section was previously titled "Scenes," but now it seems more like a general writing exercise rather than just focusing on scenes, so I changed the title to "Writing." It is usually divided into two subsections: "Excerpt and Appreciation" and "Imitation and Creation."
Life#
This week marks the end of the first quarter of the year. After reviewing the annual plan I made at the beginning of the year, I realized that the progress made is not satisfactory. I need to have a more detailed plan for my life. As for this week, I mostly stayed at home, and my daily routine was still a mess. The expectation for this week was to engage in more physical activities, but it was not achieved. I tried to visit the mountains outside Beijing on the weekend to escape the oppressive atmosphere of the city, but it turned out that the peach blossoms were almost gone after about three days, and most of them had fallen. The weather was also cold and damp, with no sunshine. It sounds like a depressing week.
This week, I have been pondering a question repeatedly, "If I knew what would happen today two years ago, would I still have acted without hesitation?" To be honest, I probably wouldn't. But it's not because of what happened two years later, but because of who I was two years ago. So, on the other hand, I am very grateful that two years ago, I didn't know what would happen today.
In addition, following the trend of AI, I have had several discussions with different people about AI this week, and even talked about it until 3 am at a camping site on the weekend (then I was sleepy while driving the next day). Overall, I am pessimistic about the role of AI in promoting fairness and justice, and my mindset is gradually shifting to "regardless of the raging flood behind it." Another insightful realization is that when "which part of the work can be replaced by AI" is clearly presented to us, we are forced to think about what is truly important to ourselves. This answer is the foundation of our existence, or rather, the basis for us to deceive ourselves and live through this short life.
Input and Output#
Originally, I thought it was another week without reading books or doing much writing (except for my diary), but during the review process, I suddenly realized... does drawing count? This week, I suddenly had the enthusiasm to return to being a soulful artist and drew two small pictures - the first one is the NFT commemorating Crossbell's first anniversary (Yay! Crossbell is about to celebrate its first anniversary), and the other one is an NFT of a "Copywriting Master" badge for @song.
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Crossbell's First Anniversary
(If you really think the first anniversary NFT is ugly, please ask @niannian to draw another one. Please don't scold me.) -
"Copywriting Master" For @song (Note: The squirrel is the original avatar that @song drew for himself, and I only drew the "banner" in the top left corner)